How the Poem comes

24 Feb


Here is Canon’s challenge over at the dverse poets….I love minimalist verse….

Not worrying about the written form too much, try to write a poem using mainly tangible images to convey your thoughts, using as little abstract vocabulary as possible. If you find it difficult, focus on a single image and try to convey a lot of meaning in as small a space as you can.



Blue skies for some,

For others, cumulus assemble

(Drought begins before we know.)

Cast shadows,

Forward march,

Bring rain




© neelthemuse, 2012


Posted by on February 24, 2012 in Nature, Prompts


Tags: , , ,

28 responses to “How the Poem comes

  1. Gay

    February 24, 2012 at 5:08 am

    Effective use of many elements making up with little to say much. The shape or concrete does the outline work while each color, each noun brings up the vast array of associations, and especially Forward March conjuring up grade school, March winds & April showers, and the idea of drought on the horizon is certainly familiar here in Texas where we are finally getting a break in ours! Exceptional!


  2. lscotthoughts

    February 24, 2012 at 5:13 am

    Love it, Neel, well done! 🙂


  3. neelthemuse

    February 24, 2012 at 5:32 am

    Thank you so much for your reading….it surprised me the things that you brought out of those words.


  4. neelthemuse

    February 24, 2012 at 5:33 am

    Thanks Lauren! Appreciate it….


  5. kvennarad

    February 24, 2012 at 5:53 am

    That works very well as a method for constructing that kind of poem. Tell me, when you are writing like that and when you have created the finished poem, what do you feel means more to you – the process or the product? Just curious.

    Marie Marshall


  6. neelthemuse

    February 24, 2012 at 6:01 am

    Thank you Marie for your view and interesting question. The process is very important…it makes the product possible. When the poem comes, there is this cloud-arriving feeling and then there is clarity. That’s what I tried to express. The product means more to the people who read it, but the process makes the poet feel grateful. Hope that is answer enough.


  7. kvennarad

    February 24, 2012 at 6:11 am

    If it’s an honest answer, which I’m sure it is, it’s fine. Thank you. 🙂


  8. claudia

    February 24, 2012 at 6:15 am

    nice…esp. the line you put in parenthesis works very well and brings a different element into it..


  9. poetrydiary

    February 24, 2012 at 8:08 am

    I like the positive, action-oriented ending!


  10. Beth Winter

    February 24, 2012 at 10:07 am

    Bring rain – fall

    I love the blending of those lines. Your verse is rich with imagery presenting different viewpoints, a joy, a blessing, a nuisance and a need, all packed into a minimalist piece. The depth is palpable. Wonderful work.


  11. neelthemuse

    February 24, 2012 at 10:21 am

    Thank you Beth…succint is best, isn’t it?


  12. neelthemuse

    February 24, 2012 at 10:21 am

    Thank you so much!


  13. neelthemuse

    February 24, 2012 at 10:22 am

    I did hesitate before the parenthesis…but then it decided to be there! Thank you Claudia:)


  14. Beth Winter

    February 24, 2012 at 10:22 am

    It is. Have a wonderful day. Personally, I would love to see the rain fall today.


  15. David King

    February 24, 2012 at 10:42 am

    This works for me. Minimalist at its best.


  16. brian miller

    February 24, 2012 at 1:31 pm

    drought itself brings much to mind for me…and the need for rain as i have lived that….you have screwed this one down pretty tight yet you still say much…


  17. Words From the Moon

    February 24, 2012 at 7:28 pm

    A great post about using fewer words. Some of my favorite poems are minimal – I tend to get distracted by poems that are too wordy. I think that’s why haiku is such a timeless format for writing poetry.


  18. Blue Flute

    February 24, 2012 at 7:33 pm

    Nice image, and I like the shape of the poem as well, reminding me of a cloud and falling rain…


  19. neelthemuse

    February 25, 2012 at 2:10 am

    Thank you blue flute….the prompt was wonderful as well!


  20. neelthemuse

    February 25, 2012 at 2:11 am

    Definitely…its the small things that capture the wandering attention. Haiku and micro poems are very contemporary….thanks!


  21. neelthemuse

    February 25, 2012 at 2:13 am

    Thank you so much Brian…so glad to see you here again. The drought of the earth and the drought of the mind….dry you up.


  22. neelthemuse

    February 25, 2012 at 2:13 am

    Thank you David!


  23. Priya Menon

    February 27, 2012 at 9:41 am

    Beautifully crafted in small package. Less words, well said. Lovely poem.


  24. neelthemuse

    February 28, 2012 at 3:41 am

    Thanks Priya! Glad you enjoyed the poem:)


  25. granbee

    February 28, 2012 at 9:26 pm

    Very successful minimalist verse, Neel! I can never grow anything but happier to read more and more poems about rains following droughts!


  26. neelthemuse

    March 2, 2012 at 4:28 am

    Granbee you are too kind!


  27. Vanshja Gairola

    March 6, 2012 at 9:37 am

    Sensible and pleasing brevity..


  28. neelthemuse

    March 7, 2012 at 4:57 pm

    Thank you so much Vanjsha!



Your take....

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: